I have no idea what I'm doing

Just once, I would like to get to the dentist and back without calamity

The irony was I tried to leave two hours early, and was still nearly late. I wanted to go to Dollar Tree to pick up some Halloween stuff, and maybe get a few snacks for the week. So I ordered a Lyft, and went outside to wait for it. I watched this dude drive all the way into town from BFE, only to cancel the ride a few blocks from picking me up. Like, did he not notice when he accepted the ride that I was only going a mile and a half? Bro. Come on.

So I tried to get another ride, but apparently either nobody was signed on, or they weren’t in the area, because Lyft could not find me another ride. I tried like, three or four times, even. Then I called the cab company, and it was like, a 45 minute wait, and fuck all of that. At this point, a 45 minute wait would actually make me late for my appointment.

So I ran upstairs to fish a dollar out of the ceramic bread in the kitchen, and was hoping to bust ass down to the transit centre, but by the time I got there I’d missed the bus.

So I walked my fat, disabled ass a mile and a half in like, a half hour to get to my appointment. In the rain. Somehow, I was five minutes early, and my god. What a nightmare that was.

But I got in, and then risked my life using the drinking fountain, because omg.

And apparently the scheduled all their denture stuff for the week today, because I waited about a half hour to even be seen. They finally get me back to the room, but the scan machine thing was being used, so I waited there for another 20 minutes or so. And when it finally arrived, the lady asked if I’d brought my own sunglasses this time. Yep, sure did. I don’t want to wear the ones someone else has worn.

They weren’t in my pocket. These are prescription sunglasses, and they’re not where I expected them to be. Fine. Whatever. I didn’t really need them anyway, because the light was not in my eyes, but being shoved into my mouth while they scanned my head from the inside out basically. It was a whole ordeal, and took another half hour or something. But it was much perferable to gagging on goop, so whatever. I lived.

And then, because the dentist sits right on the border of two towns, neither Lyft nor Uber can pick me up. I thought real hard about going to the Dollar Tree anyway, but at this point I was tired and sore and just wanted to go to bed, so I walked over to Starbucks. I thought, I’ll call a Lyft, get a coffee, and come home.

Starbucks was closed. They close at 2pm now. That’s a new development. So now I was just waiting outside in the rain like a nerd. But the guy showed up, and he was the same guy as last time, which was funny. But I’m home now, and because this day has been hellish enough, I found my sunglasses on the floor, right next to the front door, which means I probably dropped them in my mad dash to get out the door. So, good. That’s something I don’t have to replace. And then I got a text from Safeway, and it looks like everything but the cheese I wanted will be delivered, so that’s cool.

And now I’m gonna go hang some posters up in my bedroom. Because I’m a grown-ass adult, and I want to put posters in my bedroom.


  1. Mary Quite Contrary

    Omfg, transportation up there is fucking ridiculous. I’m glad you were able to get there in time, even though you might be recovering from it for a days. ♥

    • lokiofsassgaard

      Yeah, it was a better outcome than the last time my ride never showed up and I had to walk. I tripped over one of our perfectly manicured sidewalks and ate shit in front of a cop.

      But next appointment is the last one I’ll have to deal with until February. So there’s that.

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